Photo credit: Flo Westbrook

You’re not enough… You’re not brave enough, not clever enough, not loud enough. You don’t have the confidence, you can’t do it, don’t even try. You need to change, need to fit in, need something else. You just can’t.

A constant stream of messages that try at their core to do one thing, make us believe we are not enough. That as we are, the people we were made to be, we are not enough. That we are restricted, enclosed but not free. This isn’t just aimed at us, these are the messages that are probably already, in many subtle ways, trying to convince your children that they need to change. But we don’t need to be passive, we absolutely can do something about it.

We live in a world where messages are bombarded at us from countless angles. It could be so many different things but at the centre of each one, there is a lie so large that if it’s believed it has the capability to change one’s future: YOU ARE NOT GOOD ENOUGH. The person you are, the way you are, the character you have, it is not enough.

So much of our future is shaped by when we’re little. That’s not to say our childhood defines us, but it certainly does it’s best to mould us.

It might be an illness or disability that has made them feel less than others. It could be something at their school where they feel compared to others and come out lacking. It might be TV, a book or just something said in an innocent conversation. These may be subtle hints of a message when they are little but these will grow as they do.

Lies we are fed from the media, things our society has moulded us to believe. Have you ever found yourself wanting to do something new, try something creative, be bold, step out and then this thought comes “I can’t. What will others think? What if I can’t do it.” WHY CAN’T YOU, why does it matter if you fail, why should we care what others think of us, and yet so often we do.

I believe so much of our future is shaped by when we’re little. That’s not to say our childhood defines us, but it certainly does it’s best to mould us. That’s why I long for my children to know more than anything who they are now. So that when these lies come, they will know that THEY ARE ENOUGH!

They are beautiful, bold, brave and designed by God.

The truth, the thing that will set them free is that they are loved beyond belief, chosen, planned. They have a future and they have a call over their life to do something that God himself has chosen for them to do. They are beautiful, bold, brave and designed by God.

There’s this habit I’ve started with my son. At bedtime, after he’s had his usual stories and prayers I’ll hold up one hand, showing 5 fingers, and tell him 5 things. 5 things about him that I love. 5 things he should be proud of. 5 little things. 5 truths.

Sometimes he’ll just sit there seeming distracted and I wonder is he even listening. but sometimes I see this connection as he takes in each thing. He smiles and laughs as I tell him these attributes he has and he’ll look intently with this smile on his face as he realises those things I say are true. He asks me to repeat them and I tell him again.

So while the world and the enemy try to tell my children lies that undermine the very essence of who they are, I will tell them the truth. More than that, I will get them to repeat the truth until they know it and believe it. Because they are loved, and they are enough.

How do you teach your children to know who they are? Why not comment and tell us your experience, or just say hi!

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4 thoughts on “Am I Enough?

  1. Its funny how the language we use can affect our kids too. I am always conscious of calling my sons handsome, and saying that I love them as much as possible throughout the day, even if they have been on the naughty spot. Now it is so part of his thinking that my eldest will come up to me and say “do you know how much I love you mummy?” – melts my heart! I hope it brings him confidence when he gets older

    1. Hi Rachel, ah that’s so lovely! Our words are so important and I think we can massively shape our children’s future by the things we say to them. I hope more than anything that my children have no doubt about God’s love for them as they grow up and part of this will come from the things I say to them now. x

  2. What a great post, I love this idea of the 5 things before bed. What a good way to be setting your son up for self-acceptance. We tend to talk over dinner as a family (as my kids are older) and normally the questions are – how were you kind, how were you brave, what did you do well, how are you proud of yourself, what are you grateful for and what mistake have you made and what did you learn from it? We have a mix of those each day and I love that the kids now expect and lead the conversation. Mich x

    1. Hi Michelle, thank you! I love the sharing at the table idea! We try this, but with a 4 year old and a nearly 1 year old it’s not quite as easy at the mo 🙂 It’s great that your kids expect this now, I think there is so much benefit to sitting around the dinner table and sharing things when we are actually all stopping and concentrating fully on each other. xx

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