I don’t know about you but some days it’s easy to feel I’m just going through the motions. Filling my day waiting for Alan to walk in the door before dinner. Going through the bedtime routine so we can get to that 7pm deadline when I can grab even 30 undisturbed minutes to myself. Waiting for the weekend when we have time as a family. But it struck me recently, am I wishing away motherhood?
Alan and I had waited a long time to start trying for another baby. My first labour was traumatic in many ways and the months that followed weren’t easy. A second baby was never in question but the timing was important. Roll on three years and the timing was right, after months of trying, complications along the way, God gave me a promise – a baby by the end of 2015.
Are we really available to our children? Do we make time for them and their passions in our busy schedules? Are we really present when we’re with them, or are we also elsewhere?
A few months back I sat in a coffee shop with my family and glanced over at four teenage boys sat together enjoying a coffee. Four friends enjoying time together, or so you’d have thought. Actually three of them sat on their phones engrossed with what they were reading and one sat there watching the others and looking around. This went on the whole 20 minutes I sat in the coffee shop.
Discipline always raises a lot of questions: should I discipline my child? From what age? How do I do it? What strategies should I use? When and where should I enforce it?
When it comes to discipline, there are countless questions and answers on how best to do it. But one thing that is certain, when you are raising your child you will need to discipline them. If you don’t the outcome won’t be pretty.
I’ll never forget that first time we brought our son home from hospital when he was just two days old. To be honest we probably left prematurely. I felt sick and in pain the whole journey home and yet I sat in the backseat of our little car just to keep a close eye on my beautiful boy, to check he was still breathing. I’d been around children for years, so felt like motherhood would be easy, but honestly, I felt overwhelmed. If only I knew then what I know now.
With constant demands and pressure today it’s no wonder so many of us get burnt out, stressed or exhausted. I see so many mums who are desperately trying to keep up with the demands of doing it all and yet feel overwhelmed or have lost peace – I know I’ve been there at times! But once that happens, how do we get it back again? How do we learn to live in joy and peace rather than fear?
This week I’ve been thinking a lot about promises from God. We know promises are given by God but how do we walk in the good of them? What do you do when you have your promise and yet circumstances just don’t seem to line up with what God’s said will happen? What do we do while we’re waiting and how do we strengthen our faith?
Do you ever feel lacking in purpose in motherhood? Like you’re not achieving anything of worth by being at home with your children and you’re just filling time? Stay at home mums and working mums alike, we all spend time with our children and yet it can be easy to see this time as menial.
I find it fascinating that in today’s society so much emphasis is placed on career status. In fact I recently watched an interview where they stated less women are having children now than ever before. One reason they suggested was because women are taught to go get their career; achieve for themselves first and put children on the back burner.
I wonder right now how many people have lost hope. Perhaps you’ve been through something awful, maybe there’s something you’re pursuing that hasn’t yet turned out as you wanted, or maybe you’re just disappointed. Disappointed by life, let down by the way some things have turned out and feeling hopeless. What can you do?
Perhaps you’ve prayed. Maybe you’ve cried out to God a hundred times asking for Him to change something and yet nothing has. Maybe you don’t even believe in God.
I’m sure most parents would agree that expressing how much we love our children is of utmost importance. Letting them know that we value them and love them undoubtedly gives them a huge sense of identity. But the question perhaps isn’t so much do they know they are loved, but more do they know why they are loved.