As I write this my son’s at Playschool. I’m sat here with a cuppa and cheeky piece of chocolate cake and actually getting time to sit and write, something I love and I’ll be honest, I feel energised. Getting time to myself isn’t something I have a lot of chance to do and yet I’m starting to realise just how important it is.
Do you ever feel guilty? Do you feel bad about little things and worry what if you’ve got it wrong? It’s a challenge for many of us mums, it’s not fun and the question is how do we avoid that unexpected motherhood guilt?
No one really warns you about those feelings of guilt that can seem to suddenly bombard us as soon as we give birth to our little ones. I still remember those early days of motherhood, how easy it was to feel bad. How I felt guilty about so many things such as my decision to stop breast-feeding or the odd times I asked my husband to settle our son instead of me. This new weight of responsibility had suddenly been handed to me and alongside my great love for my son came feelings of guilt over many little things and a striving to be perfect.
Are we really available to our children? Do we make time for them and their passions in our busy schedules? Are we really present when we’re with them, or are we also elsewhere?
A few months back I sat in a coffee shop with my family and glanced over at four teenage boys sat together enjoying a coffee. Four friends enjoying time together, or so you’d have thought. Actually three of them sat on their phones engrossed with what they were reading and one sat there watching the others and looking around. This went on the whole 20 minutes I sat in the coffee shop.
Discipline always raises a lot of questions: should I discipline my child? From what age? How do I do it? What strategies should I use? When and where should I enforce it?
When it comes to discipline, there are countless questions and answers on how best to do it. But one thing that is certain, when you are raising your child you will need to discipline them. If you don’t the outcome won’t be pretty.
I’ll never forget that first time we brought our son home from hospital when he was just two days old. To be honest we probably left prematurely. I felt sick and in pain the whole journey home and yet I sat in the backseat of our little car just to keep a close eye on my beautiful boy, to check he was still breathing. I’d been around children for years, so felt like motherhood would be easy, but honestly, I felt overwhelmed. If only I knew then what I know now.
This week I’ve been thinking a lot about promises from God. We know promises are given by God but how do we walk in the good of them? What do you do when you have your promise and yet circumstances just don’t seem to line up with what God’s said will happen? What do we do while we’re waiting and how do we strengthen our faith?
Do you ever feel lacking in purpose in motherhood? Like you’re not achieving anything of worth by being at home with your children and you’re just filling time? Stay at home mums and working mums alike, we all spend time with our children and yet it can be easy to see this time as menial.
I find it fascinating that in today’s society so much emphasis is placed on career status. In fact I recently watched an interview where they stated less women are having children now than ever before. One reason they suggested was because women are taught to go get their career; achieve for themselves first and put children on the back burner.
I’m sure most parents would agree that expressing how much we love our children is of utmost importance. Letting them know that we value them and love them undoubtedly gives them a huge sense of identity. But the question perhaps isn’t so much do they know they are loved, but more do they know why they are loved.
Becoming a mum is quite possibly one of the biggest life changes we can go through, your time is no longer your own and there are constant demands. If you’re a believer in Jesus then I’m sure you’ll agree making time for God is important, but how do you prioritise God amongst the necessary demands of motherhood and seemingly endless chores? How do you find time when your energy is spent on your little ones?
Having been employed previously in incredibly demanding roles, I can honestly tell you that my time has never been more limited that now. I juggle constant demands of looking after my growing boy along with looking after a household of 5 and all that entails. Life has never been so busy. Time has never been so stretched. My energy levels have never been as challenged. And yet I can honestly say I spend more quality time with God, seeking Him, reading His Word & worshipping Him then ever before.
This week I’m taking part in a blog hop where myself and other bloggers get to share 10 random facts about ourselves that you may not know. It’s a been great getting to know other bloggers and reading their incredible posts so please join me in checking theirs out.
So, in no particular order, 10 things you probably didn’t know about me:
1) I’m super-duper organised and can’t stand clutter around the house. My poor husband has to deal with me tidying away every little thing he leaves out and finding its’ new home. It’s laughable now but I spent the morning after Jonas’ birth in hospital tidying his clothes into the small bedside draw as I couldn’t stand the mess… hmm, lesson learnt for next time, while the baby sleeps… sleep!