About a year ago I started feeling extremely tired, more than that, exhausted. My son was sleeping brilliantly and had been for months, but I felt exhausted. I would sleep well and wake up tired. I would do things in the day and by the time I got home at lunchtime to put Jonas down for his nap, I would struggle to muster up the energy to walk up the stairs, let alone do any of the chores I needed to do that afternoon. This was difficult, I hated feeling like this because I am an active person; I love ‘doing’ things all the time. I felt trapped and I hated it.
I want to tell any mothers-to-be reading this one piece of advice, which had I known would have saved me a lot of false expectations that came crashing down after I had my boy. You don’t have to love every single part of motherhood to be a great mum, and what’s more, you certainly won’t love every part!
Call me old-fashioned, but I was one of those girlie girls that grew up playing with dolls and wanting nothing more than to be a mummy. I always knew I would be a stay at home mum, how could I possibly want anything else!? I loved my job but I really looked at all those stay at home mums thinking, you have it made! Your days are so easy, you can do what you like, when you like, chill out at home, spend every second with your gorgeous babies… utter perfection… then I had my son.
Before I became a mummy I loved my career, I loved my job and the satisfaction that came from completing massive projects, or the sense of achievement from getting that promotion. I had worked hard to get to the place. Yet I left. This was not because I have no ambition when it comes to career. Not because it was an easy option. Not because I just didn’t have to work financially. But because we decided for our family, the best thing was to raise my son myself. To be the one there with him all the time. This has involved massive sacrifice financially for us; it has involved sacrificing my career for now, and has meant we share our home with two lodgers to enable me to do this.
Now before I go on, please don’t think I believe leaving ones career to raise children full-time is always right, I couldn’t possibly say what’s the best thing for your family, with your circumstances and your families’ needs, but for us, it was right.
For all those mummies out there that are feeling exhausted, overwhelmed and stuck forever, I know only too well how you are feeling but you need to know one thing, it’s a phase, and IT WILL PASS!
My boy suffered from colic and silent reflux when he was little, he slept awfully, waking 5 times a night until he was 8 months old, and during this time he slept very little in the day. In fact the only way I could get him to sleep in the day was to push him in a buggy, and the minute I stopped moving, he woke! So those pieces of amazing advice that tell you to sleep when your baby sleeps were of little help to me. Read More