The other day a close friend of mine shared a blog post I’d written a couple of years back. As I read it I was reminded of how at that time I was feeling guilty about so many aspects of motherhood, I could almost sense those feelings of struggle and striving again. Those “what if” questions and worries that we can all face at some point. Yet as I read the post it hit me, I don’t feel like that anymore, not at all. Those struggles I had are over and a new enjoyment of motherhood has come. It isn’t the potential to worry that has changed, that will always be there, but I had.
Wow, those feelings of immense love and responsibility as I held my new baby boy in my arms 4 years ago. He’s so precious and I’ve been entrusted with him. What if I made a mistake, what if I didn’t get it right all the time, what if something happened to him, what if…
Feelings of anxiety and guilt plagued me for quite some time after having my son, I wanted to be perfect for him and I couldn’t. I was striving so hard to get it right but my enjoyment of that precious season felt robbed. Would things ever change?
This is a journey I have walked and during these last few years I’ve learnt a few things about dealing with fears and worry when it comes to my children.
We’re not meant to be anxious. The Bible is full of instruction “do not worry”, “do not be anxious”. If you’re anything like I was 4 years back that might seem easier said than done! Doesn’t it just seem that certain people seem to have an internal sat nav that directs us down an automatic path of worry, but this isn’t how we’re meant to live!
Worry robs us of joy, it steals from our precious moments and burdens us with a wrong sense of responsibility with those “what if” questions. It’s horrible and it’s why God doesn’t want us to live like it.
We’re not meant to be anxious, this isn’t how we’re meant to live!
But what do you do when you feel this way? How can you overcome it?
Firstly remember that if God is allowing you to walk through this season (and it is only a season) then there is almost certainly something He wants to teach you so you can come out of this stronger. Allow Jesus to walk you through this and plant in you His promises and hope that will change you and your children’s future.
When you feel anxious or guilty, hand it to God and trust Him with your precious children, he loves them (and you!) more than you can possibly imagine. Trust Him to enable you to be the parent they need.
Memorise those incredible promises in the Bible that God has already given to you. There are so many for you and your children. Store them up in your heart.
Speak those promises over your children until you see them taking place.
Give God those ‘what if’s’. You can’t control things but He can.
Spend more time dwelling on God’s promises than you do on those things you can’t control.
When a worry comes reject it in an instant and put your mind on Him.
We are God’s children and to live in anxiety robs us of our freedom. We are carrying things we shouldn’t have to and we don’t need to live with it.
I can honestly say that walking through that season Jesus taught me so much and I’ll never be the same again. He’s taught me to give those fears to God. I’ve learnt to pray over those things I can’t control. I’ve memorised so many promises God has already given us as His children and I speak them over my children until I see them come into being.
I can tell you from experience, this works. You don’t need to live with any guilt, fear or anxiety. Allow God to teach you and walk you through this season and you can live in freedom.
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