I’ve been thinking about the importance of our words recently. It’s something I’ve felt challenged about for a long time and over the last week I’ve started noticing more and more reference to this in the Bible. We all know what we say is important, but just how much do our words affect? Here’s why I think our words literally have the power to change our life.
I’m sure most parents would agree that expressing how much we love our children is of utmost importance. Letting them know that we value them and love them undoubtedly gives them a huge sense of identity. But the question perhaps isn’t so much do they know they are loved, but more do they know why they are loved.
Becoming a mum is quite possibly one of the biggest life changes we can go through, your time is no longer your own and there are constant demands. If you’re a believer in Jesus then I’m sure you’ll agree making time for God is important, but how do you prioritise God amongst the necessary demands of motherhood and seemingly endless chores? How do you find time when your energy is spent on your little ones?
Having been employed previously in incredibly demanding roles, I can honestly tell you that my time has never been more limited that now. I juggle constant demands of looking after my growing boy along with looking after a household of 5 and all that entails. Life has never been so busy. Time has never been so stretched. My energy levels have never been as challenged. And yet I can honestly say I spend more quality time with God, seeking Him, reading His Word & worshipping Him then ever before.
Are you fed up of feeling tired, constantly lacking in energy and in need of a lift? You’re not alone! There’s no doubt being a mummy can be exhausting. We need to get creative in maximising our energy levels. Here’s my story of how I went from exhausted to energised within a week:
I had recently felt challenged to start being careful about my diet. It’s not that I’d been overly unhealthy, but how much fruit was I eating? How many carbs was I having? I was feeling particularly tired and in need of a change so February has been a detox month for me. It’s been a month of getting on top of my lifestyle, making little changes rather than drastic diets and I’ve got to tell you, I’ve never felt better.
Here’s the changes I’ve been making that have taken me from tired and lethargic to feeling fab!
Isn’t it so easy to judge other mums? Doesn’t it sometimes seem so natural to look at how they do it, and compare. To make some sort of estimation of their parenting in a moment of observation. But don’t we all hate being on the receiving end of this?
I observed a scene recently; a mum seemed rather annoyed that her child had been hurt by another child. She then fairly loudly stated her disapproval. I looked over to see the mum of the apparent offender, sat breastfeeding a baby, another child no more than 1 in a high chair and her daughter running around.
I’m sure she heard the comment made and I wondered how she felt. She’d managed to get out with three young children in tow, an achievement in itself. Managed to keep them all calm and was apparently about to be informed of the incident. Was this helpful?
Let me set the scene for you. My son throws something on the floor, I calmly and casually ask him to pick it up. He says ‘No’! I ask him again, this time sounding slightly more firm but still fairly laid back. He says ‘No’ again. I then tell him sternly to pick it up. Guess what he says, ‘No’! I then loudly tell him to pick it up before he decides to run into another room. Never one to back down and also someone who feels very strongly that when I ask something as a parent, if I don’t follow through on seeing it happen, my son will see a loop-hole every time I ask him to do something. So what do I do, follow him. Follow him and take him back to the thing he threw, until he eventually picks it up.
I was recently struck by something as I was disciplining my son. I asked Jonas to do something, he didn’t want to and refused. I asked him again, he refused again, and then what followed was a five-minute tantrum, kicking and screaming on the floor. I have learnt with my boy there is little point trying to reason with him whilst he is in the middle of a full-blown tantrum, so I give him space to get it out his system and then we talk. On this occasion he got particularly upset. When he eventually picked himself off the floor and came to me, I took him in my arms, giving him a big cuddle, saying ‘shhhh’ and kissing him. I did this for a couple of minutes, rocking him in my arms until he stopped crying completely and then I started talking to him about what had just happened.
As I always tell him, whatever I asked him to do, he still has to do after his tantrum and that it is not a way of avoiding it. As I kissed him and gave him a big cuddle I was reminded of this verse:
He will quiet you with His love.
If the relationship with our children is right, all else will follow!
A friend of mine recently made this comment when we were discussing discipline and raising children. Wow, how true. The more I thought about it, the more it challenged me.
I’m a stay at home mum, I basically spend 24-7 with my son, going to groups, playing with him, talking to him, raising him, but am I always connecting with him? Of course I must be, right? Well, I think it’s perfectly possible to spend all our time with someone, and still not connect with them.