I’ll never forget that first time we brought our son home from hospital when he was just two days old. To be honest we probably left prematurely. I felt sick and in pain the whole journey home and yet I sat in the backseat of our little car just to keep a close eye on my beautiful boy, to check he was still breathing. I’d been around children for years, so felt like motherhood would be easy, but honestly, I felt overwhelmed. If only I knew then what I know now.
I’m sure most parents would agree that expressing how much we love our children is of utmost importance. Letting them know that we value them and love them undoubtedly gives them a huge sense of identity. But the question perhaps isn’t so much do they know they are loved, but more do they know why they are loved.
This week I’m taking part in a blog hop where myself and other bloggers get to share 10 random facts about ourselves that you may not know. It’s a been great getting to know other bloggers and reading their incredible posts so please join me in checking theirs out.
So, in no particular order, 10 things you probably didn’t know about me:
1) I’m super-duper organised and can’t stand clutter around the house. My poor husband has to deal with me tidying away every little thing he leaves out and finding its’ new home. It’s laughable now but I spent the morning after Jonas’ birth in hospital tidying his clothes into the small bedside draw as I couldn’t stand the mess… hmm, lesson learnt for next time, while the baby sleeps… sleep!
After recently sharing another bloggers post on a similar subject line which received mixed feedback, I decided to write my own post on this topic.
I believe being a good mummy has a whole lot more to do with your heart than always getting it right. However excelling in motherhood, this is something we can actually help ourselves out in by doing certain things to make life a little easier.
Just like in any job role there are always tips on how to do things in the best and most effective way, motherhood is no different. So here’s my thoughts, ten top tips to help us all thrive in motherhood:
Have you ever felt like you’ve made a massive mistake? Have you ended up feeling guilty and wishing you could go back and do things differently? Mistakes can make us feel awful, but they don’t have to. Here’s why mistakes in parenting can actually be a good thing!
Two and a half years into parenting and one thing I am quickly learning is mistakes & being a parent go hand in hand. We so desperately want to get it right for our children, but the reality is, we never will 100% of the time.
When Jonas was about 4 months old I was out with a friend who had a baby of a similar age. This was not her first and so she was more experienced. I found myself in a situation whereby she was going to handle a scenario a certain way. I had never been confronted by this particular situation before and so I just went along with her way of doing things, not wanting to seem fussy. On the way home I thought things through and decided I should have done things differently.
Isn’t it so easy to judge other mums? Doesn’t it sometimes seem so natural to look at how they do it, and compare. To make some sort of estimation of their parenting in a moment of observation. But don’t we all hate being on the receiving end of this?
I observed a scene recently; a mum seemed rather annoyed that her child had been hurt by another child. She then fairly loudly stated her disapproval. I looked over to see the mum of the apparent offender, sat breastfeeding a baby, another child no more than 1 in a high chair and her daughter running around.
I’m sure she heard the comment made and I wondered how she felt. She’d managed to get out with three young children in tow, an achievement in itself. Managed to keep them all calm and was apparently about to be informed of the incident. Was this helpful?
When I look back on those first few weeks or months of motherhood, there are a few things I wish someone had told me. So in case you haven’t heard it before, or really need to hear it now, I’ll say it for you.
To the Mummy who is worried her little baby may stop breathing throughout the night, you may check on them a few times, but know that your confidence will grow, and your fears will lessen.
To the Mummy who is concerned about how to feed her baby, desperately thinking through whether breast or bottle is the best option, whatever you decide your baby will be fine.
To the Mummy who is severely sleep deprived, things will get easier! You’ll come through it, your baby will start sleeping more, and you’ll look back on these times as a distant memory.
When I had my son, it was incredible. Nothing can prepare you for just how much you will love this little bundle of joy. But there was something else I hadn’t prepared for. Something I hadn’t been expecting. FEAR.
There are no two people I love more than my husband and my son. But my love for my boy was a new kind of love I’d not experienced before. A fierce, protective love! I was his protector. And more than that. Every action I do, every word I say to him, was impacting him, shaping him, raising him. I’d not known this love before because I’d always been the one protected. By my parents when I was younger, and now by my husband. But this love, this was new. And with new love, comes new responsibility, and with this, came FEAR.
I want to tell any mothers-to-be reading this one piece of advice, which had I known would have saved me a lot of false expectations that came crashing down after I had my boy. You don’t have to love every single part of motherhood to be a great mum, and what’s more, you certainly won’t love every part!
Call me old-fashioned, but I was one of those girlie girls that grew up playing with dolls and wanting nothing more than to be a mummy. I always knew I would be a stay at home mum, how could I possibly want anything else!? I loved my job but I really looked at all those stay at home mums thinking, you have it made! Your days are so easy, you can do what you like, when you like, chill out at home, spend every second with your gorgeous babies… utter perfection… then I had my son.
Jesus. I’m intrigued how many people click on this post! Will the title draw you in, intrigue you, or put you off reading? I guess I’ll see the answer when I see the number of readers! But one thing I know to be true, how ever many posts about parenting I have done so far, and how ever many I will do, it doesn’t matter whether they are about breastfeeding, bottle feeding, weaning, potty training, discipline, love, more important than any of these, is this name, this topic, this relationship: Jesus.
Why? Because no matter what the problem is, no matter what we are going through as parents, be it not knowing what to do, not knowing how to feed, or how to discipline. Maybe your toddler’s having tantrums,or you are experiencing emotional problems, or financial problems, there is one person that changes everything.